Becoming Better Parents
Becoming Better Parents
Becoming Better Parents
“Children are not destined to become angels, but you can always become better parents.” From this line on the opening page to its final sentence, Children: The Challenge is an excellent book, full of insight on nearly every page. From a psychological perspective, it discusses many of the problems, misunderstandings, and practical approaches involved in family education. In principle, parents should offer their children sufficient love, trust, and respect. But more importantly, parents should keep improving themselves: they must learn not to abuse their position of superiority, not to let their vanity swell unchecked, and not to spoil their children so excessively that they become puppets manipulated by them. In short, in education, the demands placed on the educator should be far higher than those placed on the one being educated.
This book not only presents a complete and clear framework of the theories and methods of child-rearing, but also offers many practical techniques and principles at the level of everyday detail. For example, children should be guided and directed, but never looked down upon; parents should remain consistent and decisive; they should explain the consequences of actions rather than rely on punishment; they should exercise self-restraint and avoid losing control; and they should spark the interest of the child being taught. Each point is explained in a clear, accessible way, and is both persuasive and actionable.
And yet, after finishing the book, I was left with even more reflections. As the author discusses in the conclusion, what do we really need first: a better society to educate the next generation, or a next generation educated by us to build a better society? Perhaps the relationship works in both directions. But at least for now, the educational environment we live in has not progressed beyond what was described in this book, written more than half a century ago; in some respects, it may even have regressed. A great many parents, when it comes to educating their children, have neither received the education they should have nor attached enough importance to the task. They approach child-rearing however they please, and may not even do as well as animals raising their young by instinct.
As for schools, which are supposed to supplement family education, they too have failed to provide the education they ought to. Our educational system teaches knowledge alone, with almost no humanity in it. Teachers are trained in such an environment, and in turn they educate generation after generation in the same way. When this kind of schooling is combined with this kind of family education, how can it produce an outstanding next generation? And how can the society that follows ever surpass the one that came before it?
When it comes to education, this is one of those books I wish I had encountered much earlier. For readers who hold themselves and the education of their children to high standards, it truly deserves careful reading.
Note: Book information
Author: Rudolf Dreikurs
Publisher: SDX Joint Publishing Company, Life Bookstore Publishing Co., Ltd.
Publication date: 2017-6-15
ISBN: 9787807681922
